{"id":83222,"date":"2026-06-02T11:05:32","date_gmt":"2026-06-02T01:05:32","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/balancethegrind.co\/?p=83222"},"modified":"2026-06-02T11:05:35","modified_gmt":"2026-06-02T01:05:35","slug":"shelley-friesen-on-digital-boundaries-and-surviving-the-school-holidays","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/balancethegrind.co\/interviews\/shelley-friesen-on-digital-boundaries-and-surviving-the-school-holidays\/","title":{"rendered":"Shelley Friesen on Digital Boundaries and Surviving the School Holidays"},"content":{"rendered":"
<\/div>\n

Shelley Friesen is the Founder of Melbourne Social Co and a mother of two who intimately understands the irony of running a social media agency while trying to manage screen time at home. With Australian children spending more than 20 hours a week on devices, Shelley offers an honest perspective on navigating the digital world without falling into a guilt spiral. Rather than pushing for unrealistic bans, she focuses on intentional transitions, active engagement, and practical boundaries. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

In this interview, Shelley discusses why charging devices in a shared space makes a massive difference, how she resists the endless scroll, and why relying on an iPad during school holidays is sometimes just necessary survival mode.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

With school holidays throwing daily routines out the window, screens often become the default babysitter for parents juggling work. As the Founder of Melbourne Social Co, how do you balance your own professional reliance on digital platforms with setting healthy screen boundaries at home?<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

There’s an obvious irony in being asked this question. I run a social media agency. My livelihood literally depends on people spending time on their phones. So I’m going to give you an honest answer rather than a polished one.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The truth is, I don’t always get it right. Some days during the school holidays, the spare iPhone absolutely becomes the default while I take a client call or push out a campaign. I’m not here to pretend otherwise. But what I’ve learned over the years, both as a founder and as a mum, is that guilt-spiralling about it doesn’t help anyone.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

What I try to do instead is be intentional about the transitions. Screen time on, screen time off, and what we do in between. We live in the Macedon Ranges, so when the devices go away, we go outside. The garden, the paddocks, the playground across the road. There’s a natural reset that happens when you step away from a screen and into fresh air, and I try to use that as the rhythm rather than fighting against it constantly.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Professionally, I’ve also become more deliberate about not letting my work bleed into every family moment. I don’t have social media apps on my home screen anymore. It sounds small, but that extra friction matters.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Australian children are currently spending more than 20 hours a week on devices. Beyond just setting a timer, how can parents shift the focus from the length of screen time to the quality of what their kids are actually consuming?<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Twenty hours a week sounds alarming until you realise that not all screen time is created equal. Watching a show together and talking about it afterwards is a completely different experience to a child disappearing into a solo scroll hole for hours.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The shift I’d encourage parents to make is from passive consumption to active engagement. Ask: is my child doing something, or just absorbing something? Are they creating, learning, connecting, or are they just being fed content in an endless loop?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

One thing I’ve found helpful with my own kids is being curious rather than critical about what they’re watching or playing. Ask them to show you. Ask them to explain it. That simple act of engagement changes the nature of the screen time entirely, it becomes something shared rather than something they’re disappearing into alone.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Content curation also matters more than most parents realise. Setting up playlists, pre-approving apps, and guiding your child toward content that sparks curiosity or creativity gives you a lot more control over the quality without needing to referee every minute.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You mentioned that managing screen time is not about removing access entirely, but creating achievable boundaries. What is a practical example of a ‘small change’ a parent can implement today that actually makes a big difference?<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Charge devices in a shared space, not bedrooms. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

It sounds too simple to be useful, but it’s genuinely one of the most impactful changes a family can make. When a phone or tablet lives in a bedroom, it becomes a private world with no natural ending. When it charges in the kitchen or the lounge room, there’s automatic accountability, and a natural curfew. Kids wind down, parents wind down, and the scroll doesn’t follow anyone to bed.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It also models something important: that screens have a place, and that place isn’t everywhere.  <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Increased digital use is directly linked to poorer sleep, reduced physical activity, and wellbeing challenges. How do you recommend parents talk to their kids about these physical impacts without making the conversation feel like a punishment?<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

The moment it feels like a lecture, you’ve lost them. Kids are smart, they can smell a ‘screens are bad for you’ talk coming from a mile away, and they’ll shut down before you’ve finished your first sentence.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Conversations that actually work tend to start with curiosity, not consequences. ‘Have you noticed you feel a bit flat after a really long day on the iPad? What do you think that’s about?’ You’re inviting them to make the connection themselves rather than handing it to them pre-packaged.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I also think it helps to frame it around energy rather than rules. Bodies need to move to feel good. Sleep is what recharges everything. Screens can get in the way of both, not because they’re evil, but because they’re really good at keeping our brains switched on when our bodies need to switch off. That framing is much easier for kids to hold onto than a list of risks.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And lead by example. If your kids watch you reach for your phone the second you sit down, the conversation carries less weight. If they see you choosing a walk, or putting your phone down to read before bed, that’s the lesson landing in real time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

When you step away from running Melbourne Social Co for the day, what is your personal strategy for resisting the ‘scroll’ and setting a good example of offline engagement for your family?<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

I wish I could tell you I have a beautifully curated evening routine. I don’t. I’m a founder, a parent, and a person who is genuinely interested in what’s happening online, so the pull is real.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

What actually works for me is having something to walk towards rather than just trying to walk away from the phone. If I’ve got a book I’m genuinely excited about, or a family dinner that has my full attention, or a walk planned with my kids after school, the phone becomes less magnetic. The problem is usually that we try to resist the scroll in a vacuum, and willpower alone doesn’t hold up very well.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I also write. My Substack is<\/a> where I process a lot of what’s swirling around in my head, the juggle of building a business while raising a family. Writing forces me to be present and intentional in a way that scrolling never does.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The other thing I’ve genuinely committed to is keeping Sunday as offline as possible. Not perfectly, but as a goal. It gives the week a bookend, and it gives my kids something predictable.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Many parents feel immense guilt when relying on devices during stressful periods like the Easter break. What advice would you give to a parent who feels like they are currently losing the screen-time battle?<\/h2>\n\n\n\n

First: you’re not losing. You’re parenting in a time that nobody was prepared for, with technology that didn’t exist when most of us were growing up, without a rulebook, while also trying to do a hundred other things. Give yourself some credit.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Guilt is real, and I understand it. But guilt without action just compounds the stress. So instead of sitting with the feeling, choose one small thing to shift. Not an overhaul. Not a new family screen charter. Just one thing. The bedroom charging idea, an hour outside together in the afternoon, a device-free dinner. Something you can actually sustain.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The parents I see struggling most are usually the ones trying to flip everything overnight. They declare a total screen ban and then feel like failures when it inevitably doesn’t hold. Progress is better than perfection, and consistency over weeks beats intensity over a single day every time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And honestly? Sometimes, especially during holidays, you need the iPad to get through the afternoon so you can keep your own head above water. That’s not failure. That’s survival mode, and survival mode is a legitimate mode to be in.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The goal isn’t zero screen time. It’s enough balance that everyone, including you, feels okay.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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